Before we discuss whether ketamine therapy gets your "high," it's worth noting that around 2% of U.S. adults have tried ketamine at least once in their lifetime (ABC News, 2023).

Over the recent years, Ketamine therapy has emerged as a promising treatment for depression, anxiety, PTSD, and chronic pain; especially for those who haven't had signs of success to conventional treatments. However, prior to it being given by licensed prossionals, its origins began as a recreational drug (often referred to as "Special K"), it was illegal and usually purchased from someone who had a connection to a vet as it was easier back then to get it since they didn't account for it as they do today.

What Is Ketamine?

Ketamine was developed in the 1960s as a fast-acting anesthetic. In medical settings, it has been widely used in operating rooms, emergency departments, and battlefield medicine because of its safety profile. In recent decades, research has uncovered its profound impact on neuroplasticity and mood regulation, leading to its use in mental health therapy.

Ketamine Case Study

We spoke with a recent Ketamine Therapy patient that also used it as a recreational drug in the early 2000's to ask his experiences on the difference between recreational and therapy.  He shared that his two favorite drugs back then were Ecstasy and Special K, often used in party settings for their euphoric and dissociative effects. He used to pop Ecstacy pills and snort the Ketamine. Ecstasy was much stronger on the body, creating intense physical sensations and emotional highs, but also came with harsh comedowns and lingering exhaustion.

In contrast, Ketamine felt more introspective and surreal, with less physical toll but a deeper psychological impact. Regardless, he said that snorting Ketamine alone got your really high; almost a floating numbing sensation, but also as if you were in a cartoon setting that had feelings of euphoria & hallucinations.  If you snorted too much, you would go into what they call the black hole where everything around you turns black and you can't see. This effect usually last several minutes give or take. He's heard of some cases of friends that took way too much where parts of their body such half their face become permanently numb or partially numb. 

It's now been 20 years later and he started taking Ketamine treatment from a licensed physician which is not given in form of powered to snort, but it's now administered via IV Infusion, IM Injection, Lozenges/Troches (oral), or Nasal Spray (esketamine/Spravato).   This is now done in a much more controlled environment from how it's administered to the amount you get.

Doses are lower-to-moderate, carefully titrated to induce a state where the brain becomes more plastic and open to therapy; not to “trip". 

After being on this treatment for two months, he has confirmed significant improvements in his mood, clarity, and ability to process long-held emotional trauma without the crazy highs and down effects of recreational use.

What Do the Stats Say?

- According to a 2022 systematic review in The American Journal of Psychiatry, up to 70% of treatment-resistant depression patients showed significant improvement after just one ketamine infusion.

- The FDA-approved esketamine (Spravato) nasal spray has been shown to reduce symptoms of depression within hours, with 68% of patients responding positively in trials.

- A 2021 survey of 1,247 patients in ketamine-assisted therapy found that less than 5% reported euphoric or "high-like" feelings as their main experience; most described it as "introspective," "emotionally intense," or "mystical."

How Is Safety Maintained?

Medical ketamine therapy is performed under strict supervision:
- Medical screening before treatment
- Monitoring of blood pressure and heart rate
- Post-session integration therapy to help process the experience

Final Thoughts

So, does ketamine therapy get you high? Not in the way you might think. While some of the dissociative effects may resemble a "high," the therapeutic setting, dosage, and intent are vastly different. Ketamine therapy isn't about escapism—it's about healing.

As with any treatment, it's important to consult a qualified provider and consider your medical history. Ketamine therapy isn't right for everyone, but for many, it's a transformative step toward better mental health.

While reading this, I wonder—has part of you already been tempted to pick up your phone, even just for a second? Maybe you glanced at it, thought about checking a notification, or felt that familiar itch to scroll. If so, you’re not alone.

Navigating Sensory Overload in a Constantly Connected World

We live in a world of sensory overload. The TV is on in the background, you’ve read the news on your phone 14 times today, and by the time you’ve taken your first sip of coffee, you’ve already checked Instagram at least eight times. Sound familiar?

This isn’t about shaming anyone—this is simply how most people function in today’s fast-paced, hyper-connected world. But what does this constant mental stimulation do to us in the long run?

The Cost of Constant Stimulation

It’s no surprise that studies keep showing how we are more anxious than ever. Our brains are in overdrive, constantly processing new information without a break. Every notification, every quick dopamine hit from social media, wires our brains to crave more stimulation. We’re always plugged in, always consuming, always “on.”
None of this is shocking, I’m sure. But here’s the real question: Have you ever actively tried to combat this? We prioritize learning, growth, and productivity, but what happened to simply being? When was the last time you sat in silence, without a screen, without background noise, without feeling the need to “do” something?
The Power of Boredom

I get it—you’re busy. You have responsibilities, deadlines, and goals. The idea of doing nothing might feel lazy, impractical, or even anxiety-inducing. But here’s the reality:
Our brains need boredom.

Allowing ourselves to be bored—even just for a little while—has powerful benefits:
• Boosts creativity – Ever notice how your best ideas come when you’re in the shower or on a walk? That’s boredom at work.
• Reduces overwhelm – Constant stimulation keeps our stress levels high. Quiet moments allow us to reset.
• Increases self-awareness – When we stop distracting ourselves, we create space for reflection and deeper connection with our thoughts and emotions.

Reclaiming Mental Space

We’ve become so used to constant stimulation that silence can feel uncomfortable—even unsettling. But in reality, boredom isn’t the enemy; it’s an opportunity. Think of our ancestors, for example.
Back in the caveman days, survival was the priority—finding food, securing shelter, and ensuring safety. But once those basic needs were met, they likely rested, sat by the fire, or simply existed. Sure, they had their own worries, but they weren’t caught in an endless cycle of doing.
Compare that to today: we eat one meal while already thinking about the next, scrolling through three different recipes we might never make. We’re always planning, consuming, and moving onto the next thing, rarely allowing ourselves a moment to just be.

Instead of filling every free moment with screens, noise, or distractions, try creating space for stillness:
•Leave your phone behind on a short walk and let your mind wander.
•Sit in silence for a few minutes without music, TV, or podcasts playing in the background.
•Resist the urge to check your phone the next time you’re waiting in line or have a quiet moment.

At first, it might feel strange. But over time, you’ll notice a shift—more clarity, more creativity, and a sense of calm that comes from simply being. Boredom isn’t a void to fill; it’s a space for our minds to breathe—just as they’re meant to. Maybe it’s time we give ourselves that gift back and let go of that urge to constantly be doing.

If you’ve been feeling increasing uncertainty over the last few months or so, you’re not alone. The US is on the verge of a national panic attack. Anxiety is raging in the country because of many situations, not the least of which includes the political furor following the re-election of Donald Trump. Increasing costs of living, an unusual upturn in natural disasters, and fears of international conflict are all throwing gasoline on the fires of worry and stress.

It’s reasonable for all of us to be concerned, but for many of us, natural levels of concern are shading into a fixation on bad news. Bad social media habits aren’t helping.

Doomscrolling, endlessly scrolling through negative news online, has become the norm instead of the exception. Even if you haven’t heard of doomscrolling, you may be doing it.

How Does Doomscrolling Start?

Flipping through your news feeds on social media and being exposed to upsetting information isn’t quite the same thing as doomscrolling. A person who’s doomscrolling pays significantly more attention to negative news and comes to seek it out compulsively. Before long, a doomscroller considers only distressing information to be important.

None of this disaster-focused behavior is deliberate. No one sets out to turn themselves into a doomscroller. It happens for a variety of reasons which all people may be vulnerable to.

For instance, there’s the perception that facing our fears makes us stronger, and that’s true. However, the point of confronting what scares us is to diminish its power over us. Doomscrolling does the opposite. People feel less and less capable of coping the more they sift the news for the worst possible information.

Another contributor to focusing on scary events and situations is the idea that forewarned is forearmed. By knowing more about what’s going on, we may feel like we can exert some control over the situation, and that’s often true; the more you know about high-impact situations that may affect you, the more you can do to avoid or soften any blow that might be coming your way.
However, this only works if you really can control a situation. Much of what we see in our social media feeds is not within our ability to control, at least not completely.

Again, the point of making yourself aware of situations that might affect you is to empower yourself to survive and thrive, not scare yourself into passivity.

Finally, fear of missing out—the dreaded FOMO—compels many of us to soak up nightmare fuel from social media simply because everyone we know is likewise acting compulsively.

Doomscrolling and US Politics

National interest in politics has steadily increased since 2016, which would be great…except for all the doomscrolling. The general election of 2024 had a bigger turnout than any other in over a century, and the 2024 election was not far behind. Obviously, the rise of Donald Trump’s star in national politics has roiled the news and continues to do so. Every day there’s a new and potentially life-affecting change or changes coming from the White House and the new  disruptor-in-chief.

Naturally, social media latches onto these electric topics and spins them—and never positively. You’ve probably heard “If it bleeds it leads,” and social media is no different. Bad news makes a splash and gets clicks and these days, it’s not just political junkies who take the doomscrolling hit.

Breaking the Doomscrolling Cycle

Doomscrolling can be changed or eliminated, like any other bad habit. These are just a few ways to stop looking for the worst:

●     Set and observe boundaries with technology: Don’t try to eliminate all your social media use—going “cold turkey” is a sure way to fail. Instead, moderate your time spent on social media and news. Also, set a few guidelines for yourself—no news media or any other source of doomscrolling within an hour of bedtime, for example.

●     Challenge yourself by asking questions: When you doomscroll, ask yourself how the information you’re taking in will help you. Can you change the situation? Can you take action that will reduce your risk of harm from whatever it is? If the information doesn’t empower you or fuel your contentment, ask yourself if not knowing it would affect your life.

●     Be mindful of your media consumption: Doomscrolling is like eating snacks—once you start, it’s easy to keep on consuming; thinking is not required. When you’re using your media feeds, pause when you move from story to story and wait a few seconds before moving to the next. These pauses can help you pay attention to why you’re scrolling.

Conclusion

Doomscrolling is the compulsive consumption of the most disturbing parts of social media while scrolling through one’s feeds. It aggravates depression and anxiety while increasing feelings of helplessness. Doomscrolling can be eliminated by behavior modification while making and following healthy boundaries for media consumption.

Works Cited

Blades, R. (2021, March 22). Protecting the brain against bad news. CMAJ : Canadian Medical Association Journal, 193(12), E428–E429. https://doi.org/10.1503/cmaj.1095928

Carr, D. (2020, June 29). What is doomscrolling? Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-doomscrolling-5088882

Cleveland Clinic. (2024, July 17). Everything you need to know about doomscrolling (and how to avoid it). Cleveland Clinic. https://health.clevelandclinic.org/everything-you-need-to-know-about-doomscrolling-and-how-to-avoid-it

Listen to Podcast on this article here
https://therapistpoint.com/podcast/my-therapy-day-30

In this episode of Therapist Point, I reflect on my ongoing journey of reconnecting with my daughter. As a parent who’s gone through a complicated divorce and years of separation from my child, I want to offer a window into what that process has been like. If you’re a single parent struggling with your relationship with your child, especially after a prolonged period of distance, this episode might resonate with you.

A Rocky Start: Divorce and Separation

Like many, my marriage was difficult and ultimately ended in divorce. I was married for seven years, separated for three, and after a failed attempt to reconcile, the divorce was finalized. As a result of the circumstances surrounding our separation, I lost contact with my daughter for six years. These were incredibly challenging years, and the pain of not being involved in her life weighed heavily on me.

After six years apart, we reconciled. It’s been about four and a half years since that reunion, and though things have gotten better with each passing year, the scars of the past are still present. The resentment I feel on occasion is a reminder of how much time was lost, but I also recognize that things are improving. That’s the thing about rebuilding a relationship—it’s slow, messy, and, at times, a little awkward.

Losing Authority: The Shifting Parental Dynamics

One theme that has consistently come up in my therapy sessions is my perceived lack of authority as a father. This issue didn’t start when we reconciled, but rather when my ex-wife took on the primary caregiving role during our marriage. As the breadwinner, I focused on running the business, and my wife took on the responsibility of caring for our daughter. Naturally, this resulted in my daughter bonding more with her mom, and over time, I lost the authority that comes with being a present, engaged parent.

I remember a moment when my daughter, around the age of 12, casually told me she needed to check with her mom before going horseback riding with me. This moment hit me hard. In that split second, it became painfully clear that she saw her mother as the primary authority figure. It’s an experience I still think about—one that highlighted how my absence and the imbalance of authority affected our relationship.

The Divorce System: A Complicated Landscape

This personal struggle was brought into sharper focus after watching the documentary Divorce Corp, which critiques the U.S. divorce system. The film sheds light on how children often become pawns in the battle between parents, and how the system itself profits from prolonged, expensive legal battles. In some countries, divorce is a simple process, and the focus is on the well-being of the children. Unfortunately, in the U.S., the legal system and the courts often create unnecessary complications, with the mother typically gaining more authority over the children. While I understand that there are always exceptions, the documentary made me realize how complex and unfair the system can be.

As a father, I believe both parents should have equal rights and authority in raising their children. After all, we both contributed equally to their lives, and the idea that one parent should have more control simply doesn’t seem fair.

A New Chapter: Supporting My Daughter’s College Journey

When my daughter turned 18, we began to talk more seriously about her future. She mentioned wanting to go to college, and while she jokingly suggested that I "owed" her that, I understood the sentiment. As a parent, I had always wanted the best for her, and that meant supporting her as she pursued higher education.

The financial side of things wasn’t easy. I committed to paying for her tuition, living expenses, and all the associated costs for her four years of college. I’m happy to report that she graduated without any student loans, which is something many students today can’t claim. While college isn’t the surefire path it once was, I believe in the value of education, not just in terms of the degree but also in terms of the discipline it teaches.

However, as much as I’ve been proud to support her, I also know that part of growing up is learning to stand on your own. As a parent, it’s tough to strike that balance between providing for your child and encouraging them to build independence.

Communication: A Struggle with Connection

Even though things have gotten better between my daughter and me over the years, communication is still an area of challenge. Like many in her generation, she prefers texting over talking on the phone, which can make meaningful conversation difficult. As a parent, I crave deeper, more personal communication, but I’m trying to be understanding of her age and priorities. At 22, she’s focused on her friends, work, and figuring out her life, and I remember what that was like at her age.

That being said, I do wish for more regular communication. I’ve noticed that she communicates more frequently with her mom, which sometimes brings up feelings of frustration. I recently spoke with my therapist about how I’m always the one to initiate contact, and interestingly, the same week we discussed this, my daughter called me unexpectedly. It was a pleasant surprise, and I appreciated that she reached out.

In that conversation, she opened up about her struggles—post-graduation depression, anxieties, and financial stress. Even though I can only do so much to help her, I want to be there for her in every way I can.

The Financial Dilemma: Setting Boundaries

The ongoing struggle of wanting to support my daughter financially, while also knowing that she needs to learn to stand on her own, has been a point of internal conflict. As a father, I never want to say no to her, especially when she’s going through tough times. But as I get older and plan for my own future, it’s becoming clear that I can’t keep offering the level of financial support I once did.

I’ve started to set boundaries with her, which hasn’t been easy. My therapist encouraged me to set clear expectations for when I will reduce my financial support, and while I agree, it’s still difficult. Like any parent, I want to help, but I also know that sometimes, the best thing I can do for her is to let go a little and allow her to figure things out.

The Importance of Boundaries and Patience

Through all of this, one lesson has become clear: patience. Rebuilding a relationship with my daughter after years of separation takes time. I’m not looking for anything in return, other than her love and respect. I want to be more than just a provider; I want to be a real part of her life and our family dynamic.

If you’re a parent going through a similar journey of reconciliation, I want you to know that you’re not alone. It’s hard, but it’s worth it. Boundaries are important—not as a way of cutting off your child, but as a way to help them grow into the independent adults they need to be. And while money certainly plays a role in the world we live in, the true value lies in the emotional connection and support you provide.

As a parent, my hope is simple: that my daughter knows I’m here for her, that I’ve always been here, and that I will continue to support her as she grows into the person she’s meant to be.

So, to all the parents out there trying to rebuild relationships with their children, be patient, set boundaries when needed, and continue showing up. Your love and effort will make a difference. Thanks for joining me on this part of my journey, and I’ll catch you next time here at Therapist Point.

If you're navigating your own challenges, don’t hesitate to reach out or visit our website for more resources. You’re not alone in this.

Listen to Podcast on this article here
https://therapistpoint.com/podcast/my-therapy-day-15

Welcome to Therapist Point! I'm your host, Jake, and today we'll continue discussing my personal journey with therapy as I reflect on my second session.

Being Stuck in the Past

So, I'm in my 40s, and one of the main things we discussed in the 2^nd session of therapy is how I've often find myself stuck in the past. On one hand, I know this is something many people experience as they get older. But on the other hand, I can't help but feel it's not just about aging—it's also that the world around me has changed so drastically when comparing decades in the past century, and I no longer feel as connected to it as I once did, and that's where the struggle begins.

How Social Media Changed the Way We Connect

One example of this shift is how people socialize. We all know that social media has changed the way we communicate over the past decade or so, but it feels like it’s getting worse with each passing year. If we look back even a century, socializing was mostly face-to-face, not glued to a device. This is where I start to think it’s not just me getting older; the world has really shifted. I’m pretty sure I’m not crazy and many feel the same way.

Now, to expand on that, one thing that bothers me a lot is how it's all about recording the moment instead of actually experiencing it. We see this at concerts, festivals, clubs, and so on. The irony is that back in my partying days (yes, I’m sounding like the old man now, haha), when we went clubbing, it was rare for anyone to record anything. If we saw someone recording us having fun at the after-party, and doing what we do, we’d probably think they were a narc and tell them to stop or leave—this was our moment, not for the world, some Goodfellas kind of vibe, some R-Kelly keep it on DL kind of vibe. But now, all you see are people holding up their phones to the DJ or artist on stage, and honestly, it just looks kind of sad to me.

I get it, though. Some of you listening might be those people, and I'm not trying to put you down. I understand that if everyone else is doing it, and this the thing, you might feel the need to do it too. Don’t get me wrong—I myself, did it when it first became a thing. But after a while, it just lost its appeal, and I started to miss how we used to have fun, without the constant need to capture everything. So, yeah, it's a struggle, and it often makes me not want to go out, knowing I’ll just be surrounded by people standing there with their phones. And in some ways, kind of waiting to see what’s the next trend, but I’m not that optimistic about it getting any better, probably even worse.

Now, here’s the other side of the coin, where it might sound a bit hypocritical: yeah, when I’m home, not doing much, I’ll hop on Instagram or Facebook and scroll through posts to pass the time. In some ways, that’s just what we’re being fed now, so it’s hard to completely ignore it, unless you go just go live off-grid which is not a reality for most. So kind of like, if you can’t beat them, you join them, but I’m a born leader so I’m hoping some of y’all can join me and lets have events where people need to check in their phones before entering, kind of like a coat check, but for you phone.  I know, wishful thinking, but you just never know.

Why I Miss the 80s, 90s, and 2000s Era

Now besides this whole record the moment business, another aspect that I miss when going out to clubs or parties is how we used to dance and the music that goes with it. For example, now if you go to a hip hop club, the ladies pretty much have their one move which is twerking. Don’t get more wrong, I enjoy a little twerk here and there, but I don’t want your ass sticking in my crotch all night, it gets old and impersonal. What happened to those days where we used to dance hand in hand, chest to chest, and face to face? Call me old school romantic, but I do also miss them slow dances where it felt intimate, romantic, love in the air. Yup.. Another example are raves/festivals. It seems as their only move today is doing the shuffle dance the entire time. Yeah, it’s a cool dance at first, but also gets old and impersonal. What to do, what to do lol.  

Ok, lets shift gears. So there’s other areas of being stuck in the past such as Movies for example. Personally I’m a movie buff, I do miss movies from the 80’s, 90’s, even 2000’s in comparison to most movies today. Not saying that there aren’t any as I will come across a movie here and there that I enjoy, but the part I’m not a big fan of movies today is it’s either all about CGI and not the story line lacks originality, or everything is a remake which I personally feel maybe 1 out of 20 is good and the rest not my cup of tea. And other areas as well such as Superhero Fatigue, Poor Character Development, Political Correctness, etc.. So, I do find myself recycling back to watching old movies when nothing else new to watch that is interesting, but that’s also getting old, how many times can you really watch old movies. Ok, so there watching documentaries or other educational/informational shows can be a good spin off solution. I limit the news I watch or read to just enough to being informed what’s out there, but I think if you get stuck in that world too much, that probably cause some anxieties and stress. Bottom line, that industry has also shifted and need to adjust to it.

Another example is Standup Comedy. Personally, I’m not that sensitive or easily offended as I can handle any type of joke, but today there’s more Political Correctness and Cancel Culture based on certain jokes that have to do with race, gender, sex, whatever.  I’m not alone on this one as even the comedians themselves have expressed that it’s harder for them to do jokes freely, but I also do see some comedians fighting back for the right to be funny, and those are the comedians I prefer watching.  My personal take on it is, if it’s meant to be a joke, then let’s just enjoy the entertainment, and it’s ok to laugh at ourselves & our flaws which usually are the best jokes anyways.

I also miss how dating used to be. It feels like things have changed so much in recent years, with dating now revolving around apps and online profiles. While things weren’t perfect back then, dating was more about genuine connections—meeting people in person, having real conversations, and letting chemistry develop naturally, rather than swiping left or right based on a picture or quick bio. I remember when online dating first emerged, it felt exciting, like a faster, more convenient way to meet someone, so not totally knocking it, but now, after years of it, it feels like everyone’s jaded. The pressure to present a perfect image online has replaced the excitement of getting to know someone face-to-face. It also feels like dating has become more transactional, not saying it was never in the past, but just feel a lot more on the average now a days. Now being a bit old school myself, I have no problem as a man paying for the first date, however, I don’t want it to be about that or the expectations that I will always pay for everything. Times have changed, and many women today are financially independent and some even doing better then men, which has shifted the dynamics of dating. But other then that part, there’s are areas that I miss, like the days when I could just pull up next to someone while driving and start a conversation, but now, people are often distracted by their phones, and even if you do get attention, you're sometimes labeled a creep. It's not always the case, but it’s harder to approach someone now. With all these challenges, dating just feels more complicated and less rewarding. And it’s not just one-sided—many men have lost their way too, especially those who only seek hookups or forgot how to be gentlemen. It seems like negative energies are bouncing off each other, making it harder for anyone to find meaningful connections. So as a man, that is my personal struggle, and for you women, I know you have yours. It’s brutal out there all around.

I could probably go on further into this topic in other areas, but I think I’ve depressed enough people for one day, including myself lol. 

Essentially, my therapist told me some things that I already knew and other tips to cope with this struggle.

For starters- there's no going back in time, there’s no delorean, and I just need to accept things as they are, which is definitely a tough pill to swallow. But, you need that medicine.

Another tip is to start small by taking gradual steps towards adapting to new technologies or trends. You don’t have to dive into everything at once—start with one thing that interests you.

Next tip is to focus on what you can control. So trying to change the world is nearly impossible but you can control how you respond to it by finding ways to engage in ways that feel authentic to you while respecting the changes around you.

Next, it's important to celebrate the present instead of mourning the past. While there are things I miss about the past, there are also many positives in today's world. For instance, I'm glad that weed is more widely legalized now and no longer carries the same negative stigma. Another positive is the progress in medical treatments, such as advancements in stem cell therapy. Technology like Google Earth and GPS has made it much harder to get lost, which is incredibly helpful. And despite some downsides to the internet, one major benefit is the increased work flexibility, allowing many people to work from anywhere in the world—depending on their profession, of course.

The bottom line, is as I move forward on this journey, I need to recognize that acceptance is crucial, even though it’s not always easy. It’s tough not to long for the past, but I know I need to keep learning that true growth comes from embracing the present.

I’m hopeful that through these therapy sessions, I’ll be able to navigate these emotions and find a balance between honoring the past and fully living in the moment.

Thanks for joining me on this part of my journey, and I’ll catch you next time here at Therapist Point.

Also, don’t forget to follow us, rate us, drop me a question if you want, and visit our website Therapistpoint.com for more articles and resources to getting help.  Good bye everyone!

Victimhood mentality, often referred to as "victim complex" or "victim syndrome," is a mindset that involves perceiving oneself as a victim in most situations despite evidence to the contrary. 

This mentality can contribute to various psychological issues, including learned helplessness, depression, and anxiety. It can also form part of specific personality disorders, such as Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), where individuals might experience intense emotional responses and a tendency to externalize blame.  

Diagnosis and Characteristics of Victimhood Mentality

Victimhood mentality is not a standalone diagnosis in the DSM-5, but it can be a symptom or behavior pattern associated with other mental health disorders. It often involves a pervasive belief that one is powerless or oppressed, reluctance to take responsibility for personal actions, blaming external factors or others for personal misfortunes, and a tendency to focus on past traumatic events. Since victimhood mentality is not a medical condition but a pattern of thinking and behavior, it cannot be "cured" in the traditional medical sense.

Client Example: 

Consider a client named Jane, who is regularly convinced that her coworkers are out to sabotage her at work. Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, Jane struggles to accept positive feedback and often feels that her contributions are undervalued due to a perceived bias against her. This belief fuels her anxiety and contributes to a cycle of self-doubt and ineffective workplace interactions. 

The Issue(s) for Clients like Jane: A victimhood mentality can lead to significant personal and professional challenges for individuals like Jane. These might include strained relationships, career stagnation, and emotional distress. This mindset can hinder personal and professional growth, which is detrimental to Jane, preventing Jane and others who experience a victimhood mentality from evolving. This would be unfortunate for Jane as she would never recognize agency nor be able to fully take responsibility due to a lack of agency to support growth.

In Session - Therapeutic Approaches & Strategies: Therapeutic interventions can significantly change or manage the victimhood mentality of patients like Jane. Specifically, when I work with clients who struggle with a victimhood mentality, I incorporate therapeutic approaches of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). Additionally, I include supportive strategies so individuals like Jane can learn to challenge and alter their negative thought patterns and behaviors that enable a victimhood mentality.

CBT Strategies: Within the session, cognitive restructuring is exceptionally beneficial in addition to identifying and challenging negative thought patterns. I would utilize role-playing for Jane, which can be highly effective in practicing new responses to perceived threats. I would encourage Jane to write in a journal for the CBT homework to reflect on daily experiences and recognize maladaptive thoughts and behavioral patterns that are related to her victimhood mentality so that we can review in our session and role-play the more positive responses for future instances to help condition and make Jane more comfortable when experiencing similar work, social conflicts. 

DBT Strategies: Incorporate mindfulness exercises into the session to increase self-awareness and practice emotion regulation techniques. Interpersonal effectiveness training will also help Jane reduce impulsive reactions and improve communication and relationship skills. I have found that clients who incorporate these DBT strategies within our session and their daily routine are better able to manage, e.g., less reactive to triggers that enable victimhood response(s) and can move towards a healthier well-being of being able to take constructive criticism as well as be able to take accountability. 

TO CONSIDER: Victimhood Mentality can stem from past trauma and be a way for the individual to survive within an environment that is not healthy, positive, or conducive.

Victim Mentality as a Trauma Response

Research indicates that victimhood mentality can be a trauma response. Traumatic experiences may reinforce feelings of helplessness and powerlessness, perpetuating the victim's identity. Studies have shown that individuals with a history of trauma often exhibit a stronger external locus of control, which is a core component of the victimhood mentality (Cramer, 2016). 

To Summarize: These therapeutic approaches and modalities can help clients develop healthier perspectives and healthy coping strategies, ultimately reducing the hold on a victimhood mentality. The key is consistent effort and willingness to self-reflect and grow. As a therapist, employing Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) can be effective in addressing victimhood mentality. CBT helps patients identify and challenge the distorted thoughts contributing to their victimhood mindset. It encourages the development of healthier thinking patterns and behaviors. DBT, on the other hand, focuses on emotional regulation and distress tolerance, helping clients like Jane to manage intense feelings and develop healthier coping mechanisms. It is crucial to take into consideration when working with a client who exhibits a victimhood mentality if this is a trauma response and, therefore, utilize therapeutic approaches, modalities, and resources to help support your client. 

Why is there such a misunderstanding of victimhood mentality?

1.  Complexity of Trauma Responses: As discussed earlier in the article, victimhood mentality is sometimes a coping mechanism developed in response to past trauma. It can manifest as a way to process feelings of helplessness and loss of control. Society might misinterpret these behaviors as attention-seeking or an unwillingness to change, rather than recognizing the underlying trauma (Cramer, 2016). 
2.  The Role of Culture: Cultural narratives often value self-reliance and resilience, which can create a bias against those perceived as victims. This cultural misunderstanding overlooks the genuine psychological distress and the need for support and empathy (Schmitt et al., 2014). 
3.  Impact on Relationships: Individuals with a victimhood mentality might struggle with relationships due to misinterpretations of their behavior. Others might view them as difficult or negative, without understanding the depth of their emotional struggles (Thomas & Sharp, 2019).
4. Cultural Emphasis on Strength and Independence: Many cultures value self-reliance and resilience, which can stigmatize those who express vulnerability or distress. For example, in workplaces that prioritize competitiveness and assertiveness, individuals expressing feelings of victimhood may be seen as lacking the necessary drive or toughness. 
5. Misinterpretation of Intent: People with a victimhood mentality might express their struggles in ways perceived as blaming or complaining. This can lead others to view them as manipulative or unwilling to take responsibility. For instance, a person frequently discussing their challenges might be seen as seeking attention rather than genuinely needing support.

These societal perceptions overlook the complexity of psychological responses and the genuine need for empathy and support. Recognizing the societal misconceptions around victimhood mentality can foster a more empathetic understanding and support those who struggle with this mindset. Victimhood mentality is often misunderstood in society and frequently seen as a sign of weakness or manipulation rather than a complex psychological response. This misunderstanding can lead to stigma and isolation for those affected.  Society often lacks a nuanced understanding of how trauma can affect behavior. Without recognizing that a victimhood mentality can be a response to trauma, people may dismiss these individuals as negative or weak. For example, someone repeatedly expressing feelings of helplessness may be reacting to unresolved trauma, not simply choosing to remain passive. Promoting awareness and understanding can reduce the stigma and better support those experiencing a victimhood mentality.

Now, how does one differentiate between genuine victimhood and a victimhood mentality? This involves understanding the context and the individual's response to their circumstances. Here are some ways to make this distinction: 

1.  Objective Assessment of Situations: Real victimhood often involves clear, identifiable instances of harm or injustice, such as abuse, discrimination, or trauma. It requires assessing the facts of the situation to determine if the individual's experiences align with these criteria. 
2.  Emotional and Behavioral Responses: Genuine victims may exhibit a range of emotions like fear, anger, or sadness, and their behaviors often aim towards seeking justice or healing. In contrast, a victimhood mentality may involve persistent feelings of helplessness and a focus on blaming others without seeking resolution or change. 
3.  Willingness to Seek Solutions: Real victims often strive to overcome their circumstances by seeking help, support, or justice. They may engage in therapy, legal action, or advocacy. Those with a victimhood mentality might resist solutions and remain focused on the perceived injustice without taking steps toward improvement. 
4.  Consistency Across Situations: Genuine victimhood is typically situation-specific, whereas a victimhood mentality might persist across various unrelated situations, showing a pattern of perceiving oneself as a victim in numerous aspects of life. Understanding these distinctions requires careful listening and empathy, recognizing that both real victims and those with a victimhood mentality need support but may require different approaches to healing and empowerment. 
   
   

Victimhood Mentality In Literature

Arthur Miller's "Death of a Salesman

I am going to share an example of a well-known character that exemplifies victimhood mentality as sometimes we do not realize that even in famous books, plays, movies, etc., the main character(s) exhibiting victimhood mentality is Willy Loman's character in Arthur Miller's "Death of a Salesman." Willy is a poignant example of how a victimhood mentality can lead to personal and familial destruction. His demise is a culmination of his inability to escape this mindset.  

1.  Entrapment in Illusions: Willy is trapped in his illusions of the American Dream, believing success is purely a matter of being well-liked. This unrealistic expectation blinds him to his shortcomings and the need for adaptation. As noted by Miller (1949), Willy's adherence to these illusions prevents him from accepting reality, leading to his mental decline. 
2.  Projection of Blame: Willy consistently projects blame onto others, including his boss and sons, for his failures. This deflection prevents self-reflection or improvement, deepening his sense of victimhood. According to Bigsby (2005), this projection is a defense mechanism that shields Willy from confronting his own failures, further isolating him. 
3.  Mental Deterioration and Demise: Willy's continuous denial and externalization of blame contribute to his mental deterioration. His ultimate demise, through suicide, is seen as his final attempt to reclaim control and provide for his family through insurance money. Miller (1949) depicts this tragic end as a result of Willy's unyielding adherence to a flawed belief system, illustrating the destructive potential of a victim mentality. 
   
   

Willy often perceives himself as a victim of societal expectations and economic pressures. He frequently blames external circumstances for his lack of success and personal dissatisfaction rather than recognizing his role in his situation. Willy's inability to confront his shortcomings or adapt to change leads to a persistent state of helplessness and frustration. This character can resonate with readers as it highlights the internal struggle of dealing with perceived failures and the consequences of not taking personal responsibility. Willy Loman's story underscores the dangers of a victimhood mentality, showing how it can lead to tragic outcomes when individuals fail to adapt, reflect, and accept responsibility for their actions.

Victimhood in Social Media, Cancel Culture, Hollywood: 

Social media, cancel culture, and Hollywood have significantly influenced societal dynamics, promoting a victimhood mentality, particularly among younger generations such as Gen Z and Gen Alpha. This influence manifests in several ways: 

1.  Amplification of Victim Narratives: Social media platforms often amplify stories of perceived victimization, creating an environment where being a victim can garner attention and sympathy. This can lead individuals to adopt a victim mindset to gain validation or support online (Ng, 2020).
2.  Cancel Culture Dynamics: Cancel culture involves publicly calling out individuals or entities for perceived wrongdoings, often resulting in social ostracism. This environment can perpetuate a sense of victimhood, both for those who are "canceled" and those who engage in canceling, as it can foster an us-versus-them mentality (Williams, 2021). 
3.  Influence on Younger Generations: Gen Z and Gen Alpha are particularly vulnerable to these dynamics due to their high engagement with digital media and the developmental stage of forming identity. The pressure to align with popular narratives online can lead to adopting victimhood as a part of identity (Twenge, 2017). 
4. Shows and Movies: Media like "13 Reasons Why" dramatizes victimization and its impacts, potentially normalizing these narratives for impressionable audiences. 
5. Music: Certain music genres often emphasize themes of personal struggle and victimhood, which can resonate with and reinforce these feelings among listeners. 
6. Books: Works like "The Hate U Give" address social injustices, important for awareness but also capable of reinforcing a victim narrative if not balanced with empowerment themes. 
   
   

The pervasive nature of social media cancel culture, and Hollywood can encourage a victimhood mentality by amplifying negative experiences and promoting divisive narratives. It is crucial for individuals, especially younger generations, to develop critical thinking and resilience to navigate these influences in a healthy, more positive, and productive way.

Gen Z and Gen Alpha - Victimhood Prevalence

The prevalence of victimhood mentality among Gen Z and Gen Alpha compared to past generations can be attributed to several key factors, and a better understanding of the factors below can help address the root causes of victimhood mentality and provide insights into fostering resilience and agency among younger generations: 

 1. Digital Connectivity and Social Media: These generations have grown up with unprecedented access to digital technology and social media, which amplifies personal narratives and societal issues. The constant exposure to curated content and public discourse can heighten sensitivity to perceived injustices and foster a victim mindset (Twenge, 2017).

 2. Heightened Awareness of Social Issues: Gen Z and Gen Alpha are more aware of social justice issues due to widespread information sharing online. While this awareness is crucial, it can also lead to a heightened sense of victimhood as they navigate complex societal challenges (Pew Research Center, 2019). 

 3. Cultural Shifts in Parenting and Education: These generations have often been raised in environments that emphasize self-esteem and validation. While positive in many respects, this focus can sometimes lead to difficulties in coping with adversity, contributing to a victimhood mentality when faced with challenges (Twenge, 2017). 

 4. Economic and Environmental Uncertainty: Growing up during times of economic instability and environmental crises can also contribute to feelings of helplessness and victimhood. These concerns are more immediate for younger generations than for many in the past (Williams, 2020). 

The emergence of a victimhood mentality among Gen Z and Gen Alpha can be attributed to digital connectivity, heightened social awareness, cultural shifts, and global uncertainties. Social media, cancel culture, and Hollywood significantly amplify personal narratives and societal divisions, often encouraging younger generations to perceive themselves as victims within complex social landscapes. Unlike their predecessors, these generations face unique challenges, such as constant digital exposure and economic and environmental instability, which can exacerbate feelings of helplessness. However, understanding these dynamics offers a pathway to addressing the root causes of victimhood mentality. By fostering critical thinking, resilience, and adaptive coping strategies, society can empower individuals to navigate adversities constructively. Encouraging open communication, balanced perspectives in media, and supportive environments can mitigate the negative impacts of these pervasive influences, ultimately guiding these generations toward a more empowered and proactive future. Through collective effort and empathy, we can transform the narrative from victimhood to strength and agency.

In conclusion, the victimhood mentality presents a complex challenge that intertwines psychological, cultural, and societal dynamics. It is often stigmatized and seen as a sign of weakness or manipulation rather than recognized as a potential trauma response requiring understanding and empathy. This mentality is frequently perpetuated through narratives in books, movies, music, and broader cultural influences, which can subtly reinforce feelings of helplessness and externalization of blame. Therapists play a crucial role in assisting clients with a victimhood mentality. By employing best practices such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), therapists help clients identify and restructure negative thought patterns, promoting personal responsibility and empowerment. Additionally, addressing underlying trauma is essential, as victimhood mentality can often be a manifestation of unresolved emotional wounds. The stigmatization of victimhood mentality can lead to isolation and hinder individuals from seeking necessary help. It's vital to shift societal perceptions towards a more compassionate understanding, recognizing that individuals need support and practical tools for change. Future generations are at risk of inheriting this mentality if cultural narratives continue to emphasize victimhood over resilience. The consequences may include reduced personal agency, strained relationships, and an inability to cope with life's challenges effectively. Being proactive involves fostering resilience, encouraging accountability, and promoting positive narratives that empower rather than victimize. We can mitigate the negative impacts of victimhood mentality by cultivating environments that support growth and adaptability and engaging constructively with cultural narratives. This proactive approach benefits individuals and contributes to a society where empowerment and resilience are the norms.

References:

• Bigsby, C. W. E. (2005). *Arthur Miller: A Critical Study*. Cambridge University Press. Miller, A. (1949). *Death of a Salesman*. Viking Press. 
  
  
• Cramer, P. (2016). Understanding and Changing the Victim Mentality: A Guide for Professionals Working with Trauma Survivors. Journal of Trauma & Dissociation, 17(3), 267-283. 
  
  
• Dissociation, 17*(3), 267-283. 
  
  
• Ng, E. (2020). *No Grand Pronouncements Here...: Reflections on Cancel Culture and Digital Media Participation*. Television & New Media, 21(6), 1-23. 
  
  
• Pew Research Center. (2019). *Generation Z Looks a Lot Like Millennials on Key Social and Political Issues*. Retrieved from https://www.pewresearch.org 
  
  
• Schmitt, M. T., Branscombe, N. R., & Postmes, T. (2014). The Consequences of Perceived Victimhood: Effects on Interpersonal Relationships and the Self. *Social Psychology Quarterly, 77*(4), 343-363. 
  
  
• Studies and References Williams, R. (2021). Cancel Culture: Understanding the Phenomenon and Its Impact on Society*. Journal of Media Ethics, 36(2), 1-8. 
  
  
• Thomas, J., & Sharp, G. J. (2019). Understanding Victimhood: The Role of Cultural Context in Interpreting Psychological and Behavioral Patterns. *International Journal of Psychological Studies, 11*(4), 29-40. 
  
  
• Twenge, J. M. (2017). *iGen: Why Today’s Super-Connected Kids Are Growing Up Less Rebellious, More Tolerant, Less Happy—and Completely Unprepared for Adulthood*. Atria Books. Williams, R. (2020). *The Impact of Economic and Environmental Factors on Generational Perspectives*. Journal of Youth Studies, 23(5), 1-15. 

Listen to Podcast on this article here
https://therapistpoint.com/podcast/my-therapy-day-1 

Today, I want to share a deeply personal experience: my first day in therapy. It's a topic that can feel vulnerable for many to discuss, but I believe it’s important to bring it to light and have an open conversation about it. So here we go!

Decision to Start Therapy

The decision to actually begin therapy, rather than just talking about it, wasn’t an easy one. Like many people, I had reservations about opening up to a stranger about my problems, and I wasn’t sure if it would actually help or if I was just wasting my time and money. On the other hand, it’s important to invest in yourself—whether it's by improving your physical health through proper nutrition and exercise or investing in your education and business to grow your income. So why not also invest in your mental well-being to complete the whole package?

Therapist Research

I took the first step, which meant doing some research. The first part of the process was finding a therapist I thought might be the right fit—someone who specialized in the areas I needed help with. It’s not just about picking someone who will listen; it’s about finding someone who understands the nuances of what I’m dealing with, who can offer real tools for growth, and who makes me feel safe and heard from the very first interaction. Of course, there are also practical considerations, like checking whether they accept your insurance or what out-of-pocket expenses you might incur.

After spending some time looking through numerous profiles, I reached the point where I just wanted to make a choice already. On paper, several therapists seemed like they could help, so it was hard to decide. Eventually, I narrowed it down to a few top choices, flipped a coin, and picked one. I figured I’d give it a try, and if it didn’t feel like a good fit, I could move on until I found the right one.

So, I reached out to a therapist, and we had our initial consultation. She started by asking a few basic questions, like what I was hoping to get out of therapy and what my goals were. After I shared my thoughts, she explained the type of therapy she practices and what the process involves. She then asked if I thought it sounded like a good fit for me. Honestly, I had no idea how to answer. I told her this was my first time seeking therapy as an adult (other than some childhood therapy and a brief stint with couples counseling during my marriage, which didn’t last long). I explained that, without any prior experience to compare it to, it was hard to know if this approach was the right one, which she agreed was a fair assessment. But I told her I was open to giving it a try and seeing how things went.

In-Person Therapy vs Online Therapy

We scheduled our first appointment, which took place virtually. Beforehand, I asked if there was any difference between virtual and in-person sessions. She explained that for some people, in-person feels more comfortable and personal, while for others, there’s no real difference. Personally, since I’m used to attending virtual meetings for work, I was open to starting that way. Plus, it saved me gas and commute time, which was definitely a bonus! Lol Why not save a few emissions, right?

In our first session, she asked if there were any specific areas I wanted to focus on. I found it hard to narrow it down because there are several aspects of my life I want to work on, and I wasn’t sure where to start. So instead, she asked me some background questions—things like where I’m from, details about my family, and my work. Surprisingly, these simple questions led me to open up more than I expected. As I answered them, I found myself naturally talking about the challenges I’m facing in different areas of my life. Before I knew it, the session was over.

It felt a bit like stepping into a pool. At first, the water feels cold and you’re hesitant, but once you dive in and take a few laps, your body adjusts, and the coldness fades. Before you know it, you’re on fire!

To sum it up, the first session was really about her getting to know me better. There wasn’t any major feedback or solutions, which I expected. After all, how can someone help you if they don’t know anything about you? I understand this is going to be a process. Although I’m not always that patient and love instant results—like the instant gratification world we live in today—I guess this is one area where I’ll have to work on that.

I plan to continue with weekly sessions, and after a few more, I’ll record another podcast to share updates on my progress and what I’m learning along the way. For those who are hesitant about getting help, I hope this will give you the courage you need to take that step.

As the crisp fall air soon transitions into winter's chill, many of us cozy up by the fireplace, savor hot chocolate, and cherish time with loved ones. For some of us, though, rather than a season of warmth and festivity, it feels like a season of loneliness, darkness, and despair—the crippling symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), also known as winter blues, seasonal depression, or winter depression. Approximately 10 million Americans experience SAD annually, often unbeknownst to the rest of the world. This was the case with a client of mine:

“In those years, when fall turned into winter, I’d withdraw, feeling exhausted, unmotivated, alone, and lost. Completing even the simplest tasks  became impossible. I’d lay in bed—feeling numb—staring blankly, unable to muster any strength or motivation to start my day.”

He had SAD and endured it in silence for two winters until he finally opened up to a trusted one and sought professional help. This is something that you may be struggling with. If it is, one of the first things we can do is recognize the signs and symptoms of SAD.

Recognizing the Signs and Symptoms

SAD is often disguised as mere winter fatigue, but for those affected, it is crippling and causes dysfunction in many areas of their life. Symptoms include:

●       Persistent feelings of loneliness, sadness, emptiness, and despair

●       Loss of energy and motivation

●       Withdrawal from social interactions and isolation

●       Difficulty concentrating and completing daily tasks

●       Numbness and disconnection

Managing Seasonal Affective Disorder

There are coping and self-care strategies to naturally manage SAD symptoms and promote your winter mental health.

1. Light Therapy

Exposure to sunlight, particularly in the morning, plays a crucial role in regulating our internal clock and hormone production. This can lead to improved sleep quality, enhanced mood, and increased energy levels.

To reap the benefits of sunlight, aim for the following:

●       Intensity: Expose yourself to approximately 10,000 lux, which is the equivalent of direct sunlight.

●       Timing: Spend time outside during the following periods:

○       8am-10am: Morning sunlight helps regulate your circadian rhythm.

○       11am-1pm: Mid-day sunlight can help boost your mood and energy.

●       Duration: Aim for at least 20-30 minutes of sunlight exposure per session.

Incorporate sunlight into your daily routine with these strategies:

1. Start your day with a morning stretch outside in the sun.
2. Take a short walk during your lunch break to soak up some sunlight.
3. Wind down with an evening walk during sunset to promote relaxation.

While light therapy boxes can be a convenient alternative, natural sunlight provides a broader range of benefits—and it’s free!

2. Exercise

Regular exercise is a powerful tool in managing SAD symptoms. Physical activity has been shown to:

●       Improve mood and reduce symptoms of depression

●       Boost energy levels and reduce fatigue

●       Enhance sleep quality and duration

●       Promote overall physical and mental well-being

From brisk walking to strength training to pilates, there are many options for you to choose from. Some tips to get you started:

●       Aim to exercise outside during peak sunlight hours (when possible) to combine physical activity with natural light therapy.

●       Start small, with 15-minute sessions, and gradually increase the duration and intensity as you become more comfortable.

●       Find an exercise buddy or accountability partner to help stay motivated and engaged.

3. Diet

A well-balanced diet plays a crucial role in maintaining overall health and well-being, particularly during the winter months when SAD symptoms can be more pronounced.

Aim to incorporate whole, unprocessed foods into your diet as much as possible. It is understandable if you need take-out or a quick microwaveable meal here and there. But whole foods provide essential nutrients, fiber, and antioxidants that support optimal health. Soups and broths, casseroles, hearty stews, and teas are especially nourishing and warming during the winter months.

In addition to focusing on whole, unprocessed foods, incorporate the following key nutrients into your diet to help manage SAD symptoms:

●       Healthy fats and Omega-3s: Found in fatty fish, nuts, seeds, and avocados, these essential fatty acids support brain health and mood regulation.

●       Vitamin D: Crucial for mood regulation and overall health, vitamin D can be found in fatty fish, egg yolks, dairy products, and sunlight exposure.

●       SAMe (S-adenosylmethionine): This naturally occurring compound supports mood regulation and can be found in foods like meat, fish, and whole grains.

●       Antioxidants: Found in a variety of fruits and vegetables (think of colorful foods), antioxidants help protect against oxidative stress and inflammation, which can exacerbate SAD symptoms.

4. Adequate, Quality Sleep

Aiming for 7-9 hours of quality sleep each night is crucial for managing SAD symptoms. This standard range for healthy adults helps regulate mood and energy levels, which are often disrupted by SAD.

Our bodies operate on an internal clock, known as the circadian rhythm, which relies heavily on our sleep schedule and exposure to sunlight. By prioritizing sleep and maintaining a consistent sleep-wake cycle, you can help your body stay in sync with the natural day-night cycle, reducing the severity of SAD symptoms.

Some strategies to promote optimal sleep and circadian rhythm include: establishing a calming routine before bed, avoiding blue light exposure an hour prior to sleep, and getting sun exposure as soon as possible upon waking up.

5. Meditation and Mindfulness

Meditation is another tool for managing SAD symptoms. By incorporating meditation into your daily routine, you can:

●       Calm your mind and emotions

●       Reduce stress and anxiety

●       Improve your mood regulation

●       Cultivate self-awareness and self-compassion

There are various meditation techniques, including: mindfulness meditation, guided imagery, journaling, breath awareness, and nature meditation walks. To get started, you can explore various apps and tools that offer guided meditations and relaxation techniques. Some popular options include Headspace, Calm, Insight Timer, and Hallow (Christian-based). Start with short 15-minute sessions and slowly increase the time as you become more comfortable with meditations. It might be helpful as well to set a time for meditation in your daily routine.

Consulting with a Mental Health Specialist

While lifestyle changes, self-care, and coping strategies can help alleviate SAD symptoms, consulting with a mental health professional can be an essential part of effective management and recovery. They can help create personalized treatment plans; teach emotion regulation skills, stress management techniques, and healthy coping mechanisms; support with medication management; and provide a supportive environment to discuss challenges, progress, and unravel any wounds that may be contributing to SAD.

Don’t be afraid to seek help. We see a doctor annually for our physical health—it doesn’t hurt and only makes sense that we do the same for our psychological and mental health. You can use the Therapist Directory on this site to find a qualified mental health professional for whatever you are struggling with—nothing is too big or too small.

Making the decision to seek therapy can be daunting. Part of you might wonder, “Do I really need this?” while another part questions, “What should I even expect?” Let’s face it—if you’ve never been in therapy, it’s hard to understand what it entails.

Media often portrays therapy as lying on a couch, pouring your heart out to someone while they sip their latte and jot notes in a notepad. While this can be one version of therapy, the truth is, there’s no one-size-fits-all approach. It all depends on the type of therapy you’re seeking.

What is Talk Therapy?

Talk therapy, or “couch therapy,” is one of the most widely recognized forms of healing in the West. It encourages individuals to explore their emotions, experiences, and patterns through verbal expression, aiming to foster self-awareness and emotional clarity. While this process can be incredibly validating and transformative, it often demands a degree of vulnerability that many people find intimidating. Let’s be honest—most people aren’t comfortable talking about what they’re really feeling, especially in a culture that discourages emotional expression and values "powering through."

Talk therapy is like hitting the gym for your emotions—tough at times but ultimately transformative. It provides a safe space to unpack thoughts and feelings, connect the dots between past and present, and build emotional muscles like self-awareness and resilience. By helping you recognize patterns, reframe unhelpful thinking, and set healthier habits, therapy turns insights into action.

But you know what else the gym and talk therapy often have in common? A desire for transformation as fast as possible.

Western culture's fast-paced nature has undoubtedly shaped how we approach mental health and healing. In a society driven by efficiency, instant gratification, and measurable outcomes, the demand for quick fixes often overshadows the value of deep, reflective processes. This mindset can lead us to prioritize short-term, solution-focused therapies over approaches that encourage us to truly connect with and feel our emotions. This is why many of the most popular forms of talk therapy, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and solution-focused approaches, have risen in popularity in recent years.

What is Holistic Therapy?

While talk therapy is an excellent foundation for mental health care, it doesn’t always resonate with those who struggle to connect through words. Language is a powerful tool, but it’s not the only one available to help us process our experiences. For individuals accustomed to moving quickly through life, slowing down to reflect and sit with emotions might feel counterintuitive. Building trust and rapport with a therapist—a crucial component of talk therapy—also requires patience and time, which can clash with the cultural demand for rapid results.

Holistic therapy offers a counterbalance to the limitations of traditional models. By incorporating practices that address the mind, body, and spirit, holistic approaches to healing remind us of our interconnectedness and encourage us to move beyond intellectualizing our emotions.

As a holistic therapist myself, some days in session might look a bit unconventional compared to traditional talk therapy. Sessions may involve asking my client to become more in tune with where they feel their emotions in their body or inviting them to paint what they envision their emotions to look like. These modalities encourage us to slow down and embrace the full spectrum of human experience, including the messiness and discomfort that come with truly feeling. This approach recognizes that emotional well-being is deeply intertwined with physical sensations, spiritual practices, and creative expression. Alternative methods like these can help unlock emotions that words alone may not access.

While holistic therapy offers a rich, integrative approach, it’s not without its challenges. Its broad range of practices—some well-researched, others less evidence-based—can lack standardization, making it harder to ensure consistency and measure outcomes. For clients seeking quick relief, its emphasis on long-term healing and addressing root causes might feel less effective for managing acute symptoms. Additionally, the commitment required to embrace unfamiliar or unconventional methods can be daunting, and the integrative nature of holistic therapy may feel overwhelming to those new to it. There’s also a risk of encountering untrained or unethical practitioners, potentially leading to ineffective or harmful experiences. Finally, the cost can be a barrier, as many holistic treatments aren’t covered by insurance, limiting accessibility for those with financial constraints.

Finding the Right Fit for You

Both talk therapy and holistic therapy have been empirically proven to work. The question is: Which approach feels more aligned with your needs?

Do you prefer logical, evidence-based methods? If so, traditional talk therapy might be your best bet. On the other hand, if you’re drawn to practices like yoga, meditation, or creative expression, holistic approaches might resonate more. Knowing what feels right for you is an empowering first step in your healing journey. Both paths offer profound potential for growth—it’s simply about finding the one that speaks to you.

How do you know it's time to go to therapy? Let's cover some essentials first. Starting therapy is not an admission that you're broken, hopeless, or waiving some kind of white flag about your ability to handle your problems on your own. It's the realization that the way you're handling things isn't working.

 As a former therapist, I'm not afraid to admit that the culture often misunderstands therapy. For half, therapy is a shameful admission of defeat and dysfunction. For the other half, therapy is needed to make every small decision or work through every interaction they've had during the day. In reality, therapy is neither. Instead, it’s a valuable tool that has its place in a person's life.

Does Everyone Need Therapy?

No, not everyone needs to participate in therapy to be mentally and emotionally balanced or work out their problems. If you're someone who is thinking about therapy because you simply want "someone to talk to" about your problems, you may be better served by investing your time in finding a peer group. You might also benefit from support groups that offer a more unstructured form of communicating and connecting. For example, people struggling with grief greatly benefit from having a support group. 

If you're considering therapy because you want to get in a specific mindset to meet a goal, a life coach could be a better option. People sometimes seek therapy because they believe that getting over certain mental blocks could help them achieve goals. While breakthroughs in therapy do often translate to breakthroughs in life simply because you know yourself better, life coaching can be more appropriate if you're simply looking for someone to help you build a life plan that's focused more on creating a blueprint instead of addressing deep wounds that are creating self-sabotaging behaviors.

Who Needs Therapy?

 It's important not to overlook the signs when you could truly benefit from therapy. There's no concrete rule for when someone needs to see a therapist. It's not a matter of things getting "bad enough." However, the time to see a therapist is when any type of mental or emotional struggle is affecting your ability to function in daily life. For many people, therapy is necessary to manage an ongoing mental health issue. For example, you may be struggling with depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), or phobias. Therapy can help you better manage these issues. 

People sometimes seek out therapy to help them get through "seasons." This is something I fully support. For example, you may need help getting through a life challenge following a breakup, the death of a parent or loved one, a serious illness, or a job transition. Of course, couples counseling is an important resource that may need to be used at certain points of a relationship when communication is breaking down. 

I can't provide you with a definitive list of circumstances where a person needs to get to therapy. However, there are some pretty clear signs that your mental health is taking a nosedive. You should strongly consider therapy if you're  dealing with any of the following: 

●     Persistent unbalanced mood or behavior changes

●     Difficulty sleeping or changes to your sleep pattern

●     Inability to control emotions

●     Changes to your eating patterns

●     Difficulties at work or school because of a problem you're facing

●     Apathy and loss of interest in the activities you once loved

●     Trouble with relationships

●     Thoughts of self-harm

●     Feelings of being overwhelmed that are making it hard to cope with your daily tasks

●     Feelings of being so stressed and overwhelmed that you cannot breathe property or sit down to rest

●     Struggling to get out of bed in the morning

●     Feelings of anger, rage, and resentment that won't go away

●     Hopelessness and loss of motivation

●     Social withdrawal that keeps you isolated from the family and friends you love

●     Panic attacks

Therapy should be considered if any of the above issues are significantly impacting your daily functioning. For instance, if you are getting in constant arguments with your spouse due to your lack of motivation, then it’s time to consider counseling.

Final Thoughts 

Therapy can be a wonderful thing for those who need it! It can save relationships, help us let go of life seasons we've outgrown, and empower us to know ourselves better. However, the fact is that therapy isn't a magic wand that can solve problems that are outside the scope of your mental and emotional health.

As someone who has worked in mental health, my hope is that you can see therapy as the useful and life-saving tool that it was meant to be without assuming that you don't have the power to take ownership of your life without counseling.